Don't take life too seriously .. Nobody makes it out alive anyways ...

I have a confession ..

I know i'm lucky to be living the life i have. I know i'm more fortunate then the rest but, why am i never happy ? There's a lot you all don't know. There's a lot you all don't see. There's a lot of secrets untold. And there's a lot of pain & stress on me. My life may seem perfect, & many of you guys think it is perfect but, it's not the truth. After all the inner pain i have gone through alone .. i will never trust anyone anymore. All this has made me put a wall up, & no one can get through. I'm all bottled up, and inside me, i am literally slowly dying. I know this is unhealthy, i know this isn't the right way to solve things but honestly, i don't trust anyone. I won't trust anymore, i won't let myself. You guys may have been there for me, but i make myself think otherwise. I wish i wasn't like this, i wish i could let loose & open up. But, this will never happen. I'll live my life like this; All bottled up & slowly dying. I'm just an innocent, hurt girl asking for no more then some love.

" I wanted you, i needed you .. but you weren't there. "My Day:

So, babe left early today, at like 10 in the morning. ): He said some things to me but i was half asleep so i have no idea what he said :X .. Anyways, got up @ 1 and went to serra with my seastarrrrrr. Bought .. 6 tops ? Loreal Hip Cream Liner :D & Lipgloss. This guy asked if we were twins. LOL .. i dont even think we look alike ! Got home @ like 6 & then went out to koi palace with godbrother ( Joel ), godfather, sister, and mom. LOL the dinner was yummy but we ordered WAY too much food. Everyone had to eat like 2-3 bowls of finsoup -.- and hella other shit. Gahhh, the abalone was yummy thoguh. I was bloated -.- LOL ANYWAYS, Joel came over afterwards & we watched 2 episodes of CSI; NY. Thats the shit. LOL uhm .. yeah, ordered my boots today ! FINALLY. LOL i can't wait till i get them :). So i've decided to post a blog every weekend. Like a nice one. I'm gonna try to make them look pretty now. Yeahs, okay i'm exhausted and i wanna sleep soon. Byeeeee :)

My life seems perfect, but all you know is a bunch of lies ..