Basics: Stephanie Zhu. February 13, 1994; 18 yrs old. Studies biochemisty/molecular biology at UC Davis. San Francisco, California. Taken by Steven Huang since January 27, 2008. Happy-go-lucky kind of girl. Positive, confident, and unbelievably happy. Blessed with life. Love for all things beauty. I hope to inspire you in one way or another. Get to know me, I'm friendly! Xoxo

Friday, May 15, 2009

Its terrible ..

I have a confession ...
Stress week is over ! Yayyy, but i got hella other shit on my mind. Dude, i fucking read a 550 pg book ALL yesterday. Damn, hella crazy. + i had worksheets and a bio test to study for, glad thats over :) So .. the whole day ive been waiting for afterschool. Every period i'd say " IS IT AFTERSCHOOL YET ?! I WANNA HAVE FUN " Bullshit. I thought it would finally be the day where things are completely normal again .. i guess i was wrong. I tried, like i said i would. I guess it isn't a misunderstanding .. i feel as if you guys are doing that shit on to me, on purpose .. like it was planned or something. I'm a human being, i have feelings. No one has any idea what im feeling and going through right now. I wish someone would understand me & be there to comfort me .. i really need it right now. It's going down the drain & i've tried but theres nothing more i can do about it. I have to let it happen.
Oh, and i do " stupid stuff " to myself sometimes. I'm not emo, i'm not gonna kill myself but its this stress relief. It hurts when i have to go through everything myself, i can't even tell anyone what i do. All you guys do is yell at me, tell me im an idiot, or just ignore me overall. I can't control it. If i could, i wouldn't be doing it. I'm not gonna state exactly what it is but im pretty sure you guys probably have an idea. Don't judge me on this. You have no idea what i go through.

I've never felt this alone in my life. Its terrible.

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